if you're not planning on doing something, don't say you're going to then. i hate it when ppl do that. say they're gona do something, and then don't do it. why the heck did u say it in the first place if you weren't even planning on doing it?! to sound good? well i'm tellin u it makes no difference .
i'm not making ne sense here am i. WHATEVER.

haven't posted in a long while..
what to say..? grad dinner on sunday was good... slideshows..need i say more? :P great job MOMMY + DAN!!haha.

rainy days suck. sooo bleh. i slept in today...i woke up for my alarm... i'll sleep for 10 more mins....n next thing i know.. i hear sharon outside, and its past 11.. ahhh....... so got up for noon concert.. i slept thru a lot of it. hahahaha soooooooo tired. !!n then i took a nap.. mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm yes. lots of sleep today.

..............

knowing i shouldn't feel this way..but i still do. can u jus go away.......i hate this. don't know what to think/do nemore.
BLAHHHHHHHhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

wow.seems like so long since i've last blogged......but nope it was only yesterday..in the early morning haha..
but yess... yesterday was quite a day.............. started off pretty good.. when i woke up @12 hahahaha..then headed off to lunch with my friend ...good times talking..sharing.. :) thanks..n then searching for SUET GO LOH MAIE CHEE!.ahhhh must get some this weekend while i'm bak in TO.. heheh :) and canned lychee....still haven't tried it yet ;p hehe..
mmm n then at night...i wanted to go to fed cuz it was sucha warm day n stuff....i wasnt originally plannin on going since... i had macgamut due the next day.. but. whatever. i can't do that crap..so i did whatever i could..n then off to fed with wendy n some other girls.. it was alright.. but gotta tell ya, it did not end well.

newaz tired. 4 hrs of sleep last night ... GEE I WONDER WHY!!*rolling my eyes* ..oy
good bye!:)

million and one thoughts running thru my head..
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

what do i know about love? nothing. nothing except the cross on which my Jesus gave His life up.

Everything--Lifehouse

Find me here
Speak to me
I want to feel you
I need to hear you
You are the light
That's leading me
To the place where I find peace again.

You are the strength, that keeps me walking.
You are the hope, that keeps me trusting.
You are the light to my soul.
You are my purpose...you're everything.

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

You calm the storms, and you give me rest.
You hold me in your hands, you won't let me fall.
You steal my heart, and you take my breath away.
Would you take me in? Take me deeper now?

feeling ..extremely burdened.
why does it haftu b so hard to ...be kind to you...?!i don't even know what to do anymore. honestly. u drive me up the wall and down again. you don't understand.you can't see what ur doing to urself..and God, how badly i want you to see. but i've probably been pushing this too much..and nothing i say will help u one bit..but God.. its soo hard to jus.. stand by, and not do nething about this..@#)$(*&@#)%(*&# everyone says that i've done what i can to help already..but..i still feel like i haven't. seeing you like this.. really breaks my heart.
i know.... this is another one of those things which i haftu let go of.. and jus let God work in him..gotta trust in His timing.(telling myself that).. but knowing and understanding.........are two very different things. sigh.........................

half wana sleep.. half wana read...
had a pretty good night... women's cell.. hehe :) i didn't fall asleep this time!!!!!lol. not that i normally dooo.............................. hahaha.. its jus that im usually relaly tired, n the room is all warm.. the couch is comfy..sitting still.. jus makes for the perfect situation haha..but yesss.. gentleness is oh so difficult.....esp with ____ .y'all kno who. hahaha. so funny. every single one of the fruits of the Spirit.. is very hard to apply to that person.
so neway. after that.. sharon came over to watch the OC with me!!:) hehehe.. o yes. another good one.. after that 2 week deprivation of it!!!!!!AHHHH.. but yah.after taht..talked for a while... about everything from music therapy to fellowship/friends to boys (and how "smart" they are.)..haha..thx so much hun!:)
and... next yr is really gona b a mission field for me.

and of course.... our lil "jamming session" hehehehehe ;) that was fun hehe.. but i really gotta practice more............. :P

and i have yet to do my sit-ups. darn....!!!

thank You. for loving me.

its a lot harder than i thought it would be.. but God's telling me to jus... rely on Him for the strength to get thru this..and i'm whining/complaining too much about this.i really need to trust in Him and His plan for me.. too many times i've just taken things into my own hands and held it from God..how wrong and stupid i've been. He can take care of every single detail of my life..
somewhere along the way... i got lost. but i will depend on YOu.

much thx to u. for reminding me and jus.. being a friend. God has blessed our friendship..

Let the sea resound, and everything in it,
the world, and all who live in it.
Let the rivers clap their hands,
let the mountains sing together for joy;
let them sing before the Lord...
Psalm 98:7-9

*ohh correCTION.. macgamut's worth 15%..... darn.

jus came bak from the jazz concert @school... pretty good stuff..YAY FOR SHARON!!:D good job playing hehehe :)!!
I PRACTICED TODAYYYYYYYYy yayyy hahaha ;D .. not really proud of myself tho. haha. cuz i haven't practiced since wednesday... o dear. ;p yup....................... been so lazy...*hangs head in shame. need to get off my butt n start doing some work for once.. theory assignment due wed n STUPID STUPID macgamut due on fri...... i cannot believe its only worth 4%; its SOOOOO little considering the amount of TIME we spend on it...GRRRRRRRRRRR..

la la la. i feel like i should b doing something.. but i don't really kno what it is........O YESS.. sit ups haha and practicing guitar........... lol

im offff!

been reading the book i kissed dating goodbye (by Joshua Harris) .. and wow.. really changing my perspectives on the whole dating thing... i can relate to so many of the things he says in there..bout the 'bad' dating habits/attitudes n stuff... im jus like OMGGG thats SOOOo me... haha.. yahh..
hm mayb i should sleep now. gettin up early tmr..had a great dinner tonight--courtesy of jeff n steve:)-- with some scac ppl... :) SOOOOOO yum... we had some of that wine jeff gave me for my bday lol.. 1st time i've drank wine b4.. and OMG. i dunno how ppl can drink that stuff. its white wine.. and it tastes like MEDICINE!?!!!eew ahaha.. i'm sorry, i jus don't understand.. hahaah.

O YAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. i got a call from home today.. and they said that someone from Wonderland called !!wahahaha.. yay.. so hopefully getting an interview sometime soon.. and..yahh.. i mean, im not complaining,since it iS my very first job.. (surprised?no.prob not haha.) so yah.. we shall see!!:)

God..please bring my friend back to You..

it's been quite a day...
ahhhh.. lunch with jeff,brian,his dad n lisa ..big possibility that he might b comin to laurier next yr!!!:D that would b SOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooo crazy. :) it was good to see him again.. catch up a bit at least. lol.. :) and then...shopping with clint..hahah buddy!!!it was soo good to see u happy like that lol.. made me happy too!!:D hehe. bought some stuff today.....err haha.. :P
then dinner wit my girlie..wendy.. and then .. this was so not planned.. but ended up going to rev at night along wit vwan flora n them... hhaah. bumped into kenneth from uhs!LOl.. sooooo funny. and saw this guy that looked like edison there. ahhh. so got bak around 3ish.. and now im eating cuz im hungryy.
tmr.. gona chill with jack n timmy.. theyre visitin from guelph.. YAYY havent seen them in soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo long. :)
ok im off!

Open up the heavens, open up the skies
All of Your creation wants to testify
I have a song so let the earth sing along
'Cause I just want to praise You...

And the sun every morning can not wait to shine
And the stars every evening are all standing by to light the sky
Give the rocks and the stones voices of their own
If we forget to sing praises to our King.

-Nicole Nordeman "My Offering"

it's SUCHHHHHH a nice day out today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:D i woke up this morning to the clear blue and sunshine.... mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. then added nicole nordeman .. and i was ready for my... 8:30 class!!!!haha. oihhhhhh the outside jus makes me smile.. i wana be out there the whole day!!;p yess.. why am i not out there now??.. i uno. aw man. last night i was thinkin bout goin RUNNING today.. haha yes, u read that right ladies n gentlemen.. TRACY running.. hmm haha.er at least thiNKING about it..... i havent gotten around to actually going quite yet. haha but........ hopefullly....... :P LOL. it's jus.. gona b an awesome day.. i jus know it. :) hehe
OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG jeff jus told me that Brian's here @laurier today!for laurier day.. OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGG THIS IS AWESOME. TOTALLYYYYYYYYYYY .. omg. MIND BLOWING haha. i am JUS SOOOO ECSTATICALLY HAPPY RIGHT NOW.wahoooooOooooooooo !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:D :D :D :D!!!!!!!!!this is jus sooooo good..!!!!!i knew this was gona b a great day!!:D hehe.. so i'm skipping theory today (even tho i jus had a class with the same teacher earlier...but thats ok.) cuz nothing's due or nething.... and goin to lunch with them!!:D YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYy this is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO awesome. i'm soooo excited.
and then @1:30 goin to the mall!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!haha yess some shopping with my friend clint!:D wooohoo

.... o yah. so much practicing is gona b done today............................. ah shoot

;)
I'M SO EXCITED, everybody!!

Shout for joy to the Lord, all the earth.
Worship the Lord with gladness;
come before him with joyful songs.
Know that the Lord is God.
It is he who made us and we are his;
we are his people, the sheep of his pasture.
Enter his gates with thanksgiving
and his courts with praise;
give thanks to him and praise his name.
For the Lord is good and his love endures forever;
his faithfulness continues through all generations.
Psalm 100

bcbg max azria has the best clothes ever. the dresses are absolutely amazing. sooo pretty.. haha..

two words: Mitchell's sale.
hahah went wit Jeff today ...and did some slight damage to my plastic.. :P haha..3 cds n a book..which i think i'm returning since ALEX IS LENDING IT TO ME right?!!;p lol. yes....hmmm. that was my lil.. shopping spree today... hehe.. still wana go to a mall tho...my running shoes r like ..messed up haha. i wear them every day. so yah.. haftu shop around for some new ones.... :) hehehe
aw man...........................my friend might not b visiting now. :( so disappointed..cuz his visit was supposed to b the highlight of my weekend LOL.. since i'm not doin nethin else this weeeknd..hmm haha ;p
but neway.. ahh..tonight's been a good night... after choir..jus chilled with amy... sharon for a bit.. n then alex n mandy came by.. n we spent like.. a good few hrs in the concourse jus talkin n stuff...really good.. jus chilling with them n stuff... :)
what else... i duno. jus been listening to diff cds the whole night.... :) loving it.
this is from Passion--One Day cd..it really is beautiful.. the part in We Fall Down.. where they sing it in a foreign language..

Re o bama
Re I koba
Naong tsa go Jesu

Lo lorato
Le legolo
Naong tsa go Jesu

O boitshepo, boitshepo
O boitshepo, boitshepo
O boitshepo, boitshepo
O kwana

many things...... how do i articulate ..

There must be more than this
O breath of God come breathe within
There must be more than this
Spirit of God we wait for You
Fill us anew we pray, Fill us anew we pray

Consuming fire fan into flame
A passion for Your name
Spirit of God fall in this place Lord have Your way
Lord have Your way with us

Come like a rushing wind
Clothe us with power from on high
Now set the captives free
Leave us abandoned to Your praise
Lord let Your glory fall, Lord let Your glory fall

hahah.. up because i can....only 1 class@4 tmr :) hehehe
yAY.. my friend's comin to visit on fri!!!!!!!!!:D he's my elementary school friend... wahh. its so funny how we started talkin again...it was thru WENDY?!! haha.. sooo weird. jus goes to show how small this world is. ;p but yahh.!can't wait :)
some of my hs friends r comin to visit this weekend too... some coming tmr...and some more may b coming on the weeeknd.. ahhhh no time to do work. tmr must be my woRK day!.....
what else... YAY.. mike went to ccf tonight... (finally.thx amy..)sigh.

instill in me a passion O God..a passion for ur people.

wow.... the snow is so pretty outside....falling slowly through the air..dancing in the sky...mmmm :)

hahhaha all those one sentence blogs.... need to make this one longer so it looks better haha :P
few things been goin on lately... worried bout my friend..n trying to be there for/help another.. along with my own insecurities in friendships n all that ..my being shy doesn't help much either ;p
hmmm...seriously..thx gordon for coming up with that ingeNIUS idea of goin to a cottage n all that in the summer.. haha..jus makes this ride a lil more smoother with somethin to look forward to!!:D yayy.. i'm soooo excited. hopefully it'll all work out n everyone'll b able to go.. :)
last night went to lester house.. worship practice there..heh... i jus kinda.....er. joined in .. but yahh . man. nothing beats that--worship in a small grp. or u could go to the other extreme where u worship with hundreds of others..and that is totally awesome too... mmm. so my friend asked me last night what was worship.. well, its not jus the music/the songs.. its basically..what i give bak to Him because of what He's given to me..which basically encompasses everything in my entire life....tho i haftu admit .. i don't give up everything to Him as much as i'd like to...sigh. and see where it gets me?yup. my own fault for not letting Him hold the keys to my heart. but lesson learned..and what u see is not always what u get.
moving on!...something very interesting i read in my devos today..
God has planned the strength and beauty of youth to be physical. But the strength and beauty of old age is spiritual. We gradually lose the strength and beauty that is temporary so we'll be sure to concentrate on the strength and beauty that is forever...If we stayed young and strong and beautiful, we might never want to leave [earth].
^some comfort for the oldies out there?haha ;p

i think this is long enuf...................... good bye!;p

planning for a cottage weekend makes my day so much brighter :)

gotta change it up....and b strong.